Eastern Philosophers vs Western Philosophers. Epic Rap Battles of History

don’t make Nietzsche come over and put a knee up in your chi cause I’m N-I-E-T-Z-S-C-H-E and I’ll end any mother fucker like my name in a spelling bee Confucius say you can all hold these fortune cookies What is winning? Who is next? You decide!

93 Replies to “Eastern Philosophers vs Western Philosophers. Epic Rap Battles of History”

  1. Season 6 is coming in Spring 2019. Do we need another 3 vs 3 matchup? Or 4 vs 4? If so what ideas do you have for a match like that?

  2. So…how is Sun Tuz a philosophical writer?

    No disrespect, but war tactics aren't really something to learn how to best live ones life

  3. I like how in each team, they have the one that started the fights which happened to be the middle guy (Socrates, Sun Tzu) the low pitched (Nietzsche, Laozi) and the higher pitched one (Voltaire, Confucius)

  4. Really? No one gonna mention the very end instead of asking who won he asks 'what is winning?' Considering it's an ERB between philosophers I found that hilarious… Just me? Fuck…

  5. he is toxic like a hemlock sip… so he is so toxic he kills himself.. oof. so dang toxic he tears apart his own team, and he just admitted it!

  6. So they think Chinese philosophers are just Chinese American teenagers working in a Panda Express.

    Great, seems that the ignorance of the west would indeed be an opportunity

  7. If you look at Lao Tzu, who is at the back of Sun Tzu, who was roasting about Confucious's eyebrows fitting better on his face, you can see that he's like "Ohhh roast!"

  8. Upon further reflection, there’s a lot better Western philosophers that could’ve been used and would’ve whipped the pants off the Orientals. Voltaire and Nietzsche are both modern – where’s the medieval philosopher like St Thomas Aquinas? Or how about St Augustine for some western thought?

  9. The anouncer should had said "when is next?" not who. That would had made it sound more vague and philosopher-y.

  10. Was spielen Sie mit Baby & Haben Erwachsen Pampers & Nobel Preis……Geben Sie es zurück……Sollte ich Euch angreifen danach…

  11. Nietzsche: Insults Socrates
    Socrates: Insults back but harsher
    Voltaire: "Wow pls chill we can still win
    Socrates: kys
    Voltaire: Beef Frank

    Edit: ok. Nietsche is just so badass. Socrates truly looks like a satyros. And Voltaire is Voltaire.

  13. Sun Tzu: Why don't you tell your eyebrows they need to fit better on your face has weird eyebrows
    Confucius: I'll smack that warmongering head out of your to-go box hat wears a to-go box hat

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