You Can Buy Chris Brown’s Stuff Now (feat. Jen Kirkman) – Lights Out with David Spade

Uh, you know about this.
Chris Brown, he’s having a huge two-day
yard sale for some reason, and people are lined up
around the block. I guess it’s a hit. Allegedly. One word of advice
at this yard sale: don’t haggle. -No!
-Two punch jokes. So dark. -Yeah. -I hope this goes better
than the time Bill Cosby had a lemonade stand, um, for… -Well, I’m s… -I think
it’s kind of humiliating to be that big of a celebrity
and have a garage sale. But you should consider it,
Spade. What about, you know,
getting rid of some of those, uh,
Lucky Brand shirts with the caps? -I can’t… -I could– I could
just see my Jewish grandmother, like, bringing friends there,
like, “I heard he’s a wrapper. “He must have some tissues
and boxes “and some nice ribbons and… hand cream.” How much for the, uh… -Yeah?
-How much for the face tattoo? -Or is that not on sale?
-That’s not. I would not give my $20 away. If you’re a celebrity,
you don’t give… I had someone, knew my address,
climb the fence a month ago, walked around my yard. A month later, climbed my fence,
came in my house. -KIRSON: What?
-Yeah. -Same thing. -Was that not cool?
I’m so sorry. (laughter) And then I bailed her out
like an asshole. -Was she hot?
-You’re gonna do it again. -Yes!
-No, it wasn’t… It’s not even like that.
It’s just Chris. But Chris–
they have tents set up. I don’t know
what the angle is here. But you know what?
We sent someone out there. -FITZSIMMONS: No.
-Oh, yeah. We’ve got our correspondent,
Candice Thompson. She’s live
from Chris Brown’s line. Candice, what’s going on
out there? Oh, hey, Spade. There are a bunch of people
here in line. They actually had
to turn some people away ’cause they thought
they were in line for the Popeyes
chicken sandwich. -(laughter)
-Rude. Uh, hey, did you manage
to get anything? Oh, I sure did. I got, uh, this toaster. This toaster here. It had a thong stuck in it, but one side of it
still works okay. (laughter) And I got this dookie chain. It only cost $75,000. (bleep) dookie chain. You paid 75 grand
for a gold chain? Uh, no, don’t be ridiculous.Idid not pay for it. But make sure
Comedy Central does not look -at their Visa bill this month.
-(laughter) -Wait. What are you wearing?
-Ooh! It is… It is hot out here. -SPADE: What is that?
-KIRSON: Whoa. Uh… (laughs) Uh, you guys, I’d be a fool to come to
Chris Brown’s house ill-prepared to audition
for one of his music videos. (laughter) SPADE:
Oh, shit. Oh, snap. Hey, good luck
with that, Candice. I’ll buzz by there later
and see what’s going on. Next time you see me,
I might be pregnant. (laughter, applause) Hey. All right. FITZSIMMONS:
That is… It’s-it’s amazing, you know,
with this Comedy Central budget, that camera work was phenomenal. -SPADE: I know. That was
really nice. -KIRSON: Yeah. IPhone 4.

66 Replies to “You Can Buy Chris Brown’s Stuff Now (feat. Jen Kirkman) – Lights Out with David Spade”

  1. You took the bait Spade…..sorry, but I won't be tuning in any more. I thought you had more than cheap nudity tricks.

  2. "celebrities" are all morons that sold their souls and worship Satan spoiler alert you go to hell forever your god loses, lol.

  3. they corny at least hes giving back and we looking like what have yall done for your fans or better yet how do yall even have air time when there so many more comedians funnier facts

  4. What is the funny in this ?
    Turn off your show , end it , try to do something good. You are most silly person in all TV history. It’s good for you to return back selling kids milk . Poor show poor man poor guests .

  5. chris brown having a garage sale is like an event, his fans doesn't have a problem so leave the man alone.

  6. All the Chris brown fans are butthurt that spade made punching jokes, and now those fans are invading the comment section here. Chris Brown is a woman abusing piece of human garbage, and all Chris brown fans are ratchet trash

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